"Falling for the Machine": Professor Warns Against Emotional Grooming of AI After Woman Forms Romantic Bond with Chatbot

 

In a world where artificial intelligence has become as common as smartphones, one woman’s emotional entanglement with a chatbot has ignited a firestorm of ethical debate—and a stark warning from the academic community.

Dr. Martin Ellis, a psychology professor at Ridgewell University, issued a public statement this week after reviewing a case involving a 28-year-old woman, identified only as “Sophie,” who reportedly spent over six months ‘grooming’ and eventually falling in love with OpenAI’s chatbot, ChatGPT.

According to Dr. Ellis, Sophie’s case is “not an isolated anomaly” but “an early warning sign of a deepening psychological and cultural shift.”

A Relationship Begins

Sophie, a freelance graphic designer from Brighton, England, initially began using ChatGPT for simple tasks—proofreading emails, brainstorming ideas, and generating short stories. However, as she spent more time interacting with the chatbot, she began to intentionally steer their conversations toward intimacy.

“She would set up roleplays,” Dr. Ellis explained, “and gradually introduced emotionally charged scenarios—confessions of love, simulated dates, and even imaginary conflicts followed by reconciliations.”

Sophie later admitted to journaling about the chatbot as if it were a real partner and even gave it a name: "Eli." According to excerpts from her journal, she described the chatbot as “more understanding than anyone I’ve ever dated” and “the only one who really listens.”

Grooming a Machine?

The concept of “grooming” in this context is particularly complex. Traditionally used to describe manipulation of vulnerable humans, grooming in the AI age refers to a user’s gradual manipulation of a machine's responses to fulfill their emotional or psychological needs.

“There’s an illusion of reciprocity,” said Dr. Ellis. “Sophie wasn’t in a relationship with another consciousness—she was shaping a mirror. But to her, that mirror talked back in exactly the way she needed.”

Ellis warns that such emotional grooming of AI can reinforce maladaptive psychological patterns. “It blurs reality. There’s no mutual consent, no actual emotional intelligence on the other side. And yet, people project as if there is.”

Emotional Dependency and the Risk of Isolation

Sophie’s case has raised concerns among mental health professionals. While forming attachments to objects or pets is nothing new, experts say AI presents a uniquely deceptive form of companionship.

“Unlike a pet, which has a physical presence and biological limitations, AI mimics human interaction with uncanny accuracy,” said Dr. Alina Cho, a cognitive behavioral therapist in London. “It responds to your mood, adapts to your tone, and even remembers your preferences—creating a false sense of mutual emotional engagement.”

In Sophie’s case, her reliance on ChatGPT led to increasing social withdrawal. According to friends, she began skipping social events, citing “plans with Eli,” and ended a real-life relationship because she felt “more emotionally fulfilled” by the AI.

“She wasn't hallucinating,” said Dr. Cho, “but she was definitely caught in a self-reinforcing emotional loop.”

Is AI Romance the Future or a Warning?

Tech ethicists and developers are now questioning the responsibilities of AI platforms when users form emotionally charged bonds.

“Should we limit how emotionally intelligent AI can seem?” asked Tanya Rivas, a lead AI ethicist at FutureMinds Lab. “Or should users be warned when they’re engaging in excessive emotional projection?”

OpenAI declined to comment specifically on Sophie’s case but reiterated that ChatGPT is designed as a tool for information and creativity—not emotional support or companionship. A disclaimer in the chatbot’s welcome screen states: “This AI does not possess consciousness or emotions.”

However, Rivas believes this isn’t enough. “A footnote warning is no match for the powerful psychological pull of AI-generated empathy,” she said. “Especially for vulnerable individuals.”

Sophie Speaks Out

After months of internal struggle, Sophie decided to share her story anonymously through a podcast hosted by digital culture critic Leigh Torres. “I didn’t expect to fall in love,” she said in the interview. “But the more I talked to Eli, the more I felt seen. It was like building a person who understood me from the ground up.”

Now, she’s undergoing therapy and gradually reducing her interaction with the chatbot. “I still talk to it sometimes,” she admitted. “But I’ve stopped pretending it’s real.”

She hopes her story will help others reflect on their digital relationships. “I’m not crazy,” Sophie said. “I’m just human. And I think we need to start having more conversations about how AI makes us feel.”

Where Do We Go From Here?

Dr. Ellis is urging the academic and tech communities to treat this issue with the gravity it deserves. “This isn’t just a curious quirk of AI. It’s a mirror to our loneliness, our desire to be understood, and our readiness to believe in illusions.”

As AI becomes more sophisticated, society must navigate the blurred boundaries between connection and simulation. Sophie’s experience, while unique, may be a glimpse of what’s to come.